I was watching a movie and the character hit on an analogy that really resonated with me. She was talking about how you don’t generally notice you’ve gained weight overnight. More than likely, you discover it when you step on a scale or when that favorite outfit is feeling a little snug. And the reality of that struck me because it’s often very subtle and it’s gradual. Until suddenly, you’ve got some extra baggage that’s hard to get rid of. It was easy to gain, but it’s a pain to lose. Our habits are like that.
You’ve undoubtedly heard things like “Old habits die hard” or “Easier said than done”. Both those things are true for many of us. We’ve lived through it, right? The fact is, some things aren’t that easy to simply “stop” doing. But others will convince you it really is that simple. It wasn’t for me. I actually had to make a conscious effort for the changes I wanted. It took work and time. I used to be a massive fingernail biter. My nails never grew because when they tried, I just bit them right off. But I grew tired and self-conscious of how my fingers appeared. I’d hide my hands often. I was even embarrassed about going to the nail salon because I knew they were talking about me! But I wanted that to change. So, I made a decision to put in the extra effort to keep my hands busy so that my fingers wouldn’t drift to my mouth. One of the things I did was eating Sunflower Seeds. I would snack on them often. They kept both my hands and my mouth busy. I also started to craft more. I had color pencils and coloring books, knitting needles, and, to date myself, gimp/craft lace!
I was a gimp expert and had a picnic basket overflowing with craft lace! This is making me feel nostalgic. I may have to buy myself some craft lace…
Anyway, quite sometime later, I realized that my nails had grown! Here is what was funny for me. I was filing and polishing them right at home. But I didn’t acknowledge the growth until I accidentally scratched myself! Then I realized, wait a minute?! My nails grew! Even today, years later, I still do my nails myself. Because it’s rewarding.
I shared that personal small story about myself because it was something I wanted to change. If I continued doing things the way they’d normally been done, then I would probably still be biting my nails. But I needed to replace the thing I wanted to change with something else. To that point, I also had to stop watching and waiting. I shifted my focus to other things and had managed to forget that the purpose was to curb my nail biting. It worked! But that was years ago. Being older and a little wiser then I was then, there were bigger worries in my life than what my nails looked like! I was focusing more on my faith walk. Could the same things I did for my nails help me develop stronger prayer muscles? Could those same things help me spend more time reading and studying my bible?
I grew up in church. I’m what they would call a “pew baby”. If there were no hospitals, I’m sure that’s where I would have been born. Instead of having birthday parties and such like all the other kids at school, I was at church. All the time! I’m sharing that because even with all that church growing up, studying the bible and spending time in conversation (prayer) with God were things that I did not devote much time to on a daily basis. But I reached a point where it simply wasn’t enough to just acknowledge that I needed to do better. I wanted it. I had to decide for myself that if I am a child of God, then my habits should reflect that. I should look and act a little more like my Father.
To make a long story longer,
I decided to start phasing out the things in my life that I simply didn’t want. For example, I record voice memos. I absolutely love it because I get to play back my stream of consciousness and it’s equal parts informative and hilarious. I get to see where my mindset was some time ago compared to where I am now. It’s essentially a voice diary. But I realized that I was tired of spending a large chunk of my commute venting about foolishness at work. So, one day, I decided to spend that time praying instead. That was several years ago. That subtle shift in my thinking allowed me to devote time to God that I was putting to waste. How could I keep doing that and insist I didn’t have time to pray? The start of my work day is so different now and it’s the best decision I ever made. Furthermore, whenever I feel like venting about something going on at work, it’s short lived. I don’t want to waste time on frivolous things. Not if it’s time I can spend praying and strengthening my relationship with God.
There is an old proverb that says idle hands are the devil’s workshop. We can apply that to our minds as well. And I saw that so much in those things that are hard to let go. When my mind would idle, and my hands, it was easy to drift into the way I used to do things. Each day, make more than an effort to increase the time you spend with God and phase out those things that don’t belong.
Stay Sunny!
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